What's you name, boy,
well,
sit down here son.

You know I've always liked you
cause yer different.
Yer not like everybody else here.
Everybody else gots an agenda.

Did I ever tell you that I'm famous?
Can't go into that right now.
Never know, never know,
you know they know.

Big brother bought this coffee house because he knew
I'd eventually end up here.
Good bagels, but they're laced.
They want me that bad.

They put electronic tracking gel in my toothpaste.
The OL put electronic tracking gel in the toothpaste canister
but I found it.

Did I ever tell you
I'm a Nobel Prize winner in Smarts
but everybody gots an agenda
and Albert,
you know Albert,
was
rifling through my journal,
people always doin that.

Mariah Carey took my songs,
all she did was switch around the letters
but Albert, Albert,
was E = MC, no squared,
he puts on a "2" at the end.
The "2" don't mean nothing,
but I didn't tell you that son.

They hear, they hear.
Man those satellites were built for me.
They find me.
All that other shit, Kadaffi, Hussein,
those are actors to cover up the fact
it's me they want.

But, I stopped bathing
(because Big Brother can't see dirt).
FBI, CIA, NAACP, SA, SS, PTA, DMV, NAFTA,
they all in it.
Can't be too careful,
they watch.

Son, did I ever tell you,
Jim wrote all his songs about me.
We never met, but he knew me.
I passed him all his ideas, got no credit.
Big Brother threw him in a Scandinavian Jail
just when he was gonna call me on stage along with Clapton.
I wrote all his songs too.
Cause son, I got ESP.

I like you, you're different.
Tell you, that house up on that mountain,
well,
that's mine, that one right there.
I just come down here to sleep.

Big Brother cans my brain waves while I sleep,
through the lamp shade,
but I have a home,
not like these other guys.
Can I have a dollar or two,
left my wallet at home.
Thanks.
My butler sometimes forgets to remind me
when I leave my keys
and he sleeps away from the door in the back.
When I get back in I'm gonna fire him,
I think he's a spy.
Can't get good help,
you want a job?
Well, I'll keep you in mind.

Anyway,
I should go now.
Can I get another cigarette.
Thanks, you know I like you.
You're not like everybody else.
They all got agendas.

Copyright, EPB, 1995